Toru Goto endured 12 years of dehumanizing confinement – only to be thrown out with nothing on a cold winter night.
Toru Goto speaking during the online conference on 19th September 2026. ScreenshotPart 6 of “My Experience of Abduction, Confinement, and Forced Deconversion”, a testimony on 19th September 2026 by Toru Goto (後藤徹), a Japanese member of the Family Federation and victim of attempted coercive faith-breaking – locked up for over 12 years in apartment turned prison. This first-hand witness account – of high relevance for the current dissolution case against the Family Federation in Japan – was delivered at a Zoom conference organized by Peace and Reconciliation Together (PnR-T), a Dutch-registered foundation focused on reconciliation, peacebuilding, dialogue, and healing historical conflicts.
Continued from part 1: Apartment Turned Prison: 12 Years to Break Faith
Continued from part 2: Escaped from 1st Confinement, But Abducted Again
Continued from part 3: Inside the Room Where They Tried to Break Faith
Continued from part 4: Trapped: 13 Breaking Faith of 1 in Locked Room
Continued from part 5: For 12 Years They Took My Freedom, Not My Faith
Continued in part 7: The Grueling, Lonely 10-km Walk to Freedom
Toru Goto, representing the National Association of Victims of Abduction, Confinement, and Forced Deconversion, speaking at a symposium in Tokyo on 1st March 2025. Behind him, photos of him showing his severely emaciated condition immediately after his more than 12 years long forcible detention. Photo: Takahide Ishii (石井孝秀).Because of the strength I received from God, I was able to endure and confront the seemingly endless struggle of confinement without giving up. When the confinement dragged on, and I realized that I could not escape even by force, I went on hunger strike as an act of protest.
In 2004 and 2005, I fasted for three weeks each year. In 2006, I decided to continue an indefinite fast until I was released. Eventually, fearing for my life, I had to abandon the fast after 30 days.
Even afterward, I was not given sufficient food. For days at a time, I survived on small bowls of thin rice porridge and diluted sports drinks.
In the midst of my fear and weakness, I secretly ate small amounts of mayonnaise, ketchup, vegetable leaves and stems, and even uncooked rice, whenever I could find them without being noticed.
After ten years of confinement, my struggle was no longer simply a struggle to preserve my faith. It had also become a struggle to prevent my heart from being controlled by hatred. I felt an uncontrollable hatred beginning to take hold of me.
See also Abducted for Their Faith: Japan’s Untold Story
I became afraid that if this continued, I might hurt myself or someone else. I thought,
“There is nothing I can do except rely on God.”
So, in the early hours of the morning, after my family had gone to sleep, I prayed for two or three hours at a time.
“Heavenly Father, it has already been ten years since I was confined. I feel as though I am going to break. I cannot control this hatred. What am I supposed to do?”
As I continued praying, I suddenly had an intuitive awareness that I was loved by God, and I was filled with an indescribable sense of peace.
Then I began receiving messages – not as an audible voice, but as an inner voice or inspiration, almost as though the messages were coming from the wall.
This is something I actually drew while I was confined in the apartment. (Showing image)
“Trust me. I will guide you. Entrust yourself to me. Watch carefully. See my power. See what I can do.”
During more than 12 years of confinement, Toru Goto wrote down messages he received, on scrap paper from an old calendar. Photo: Toru GotoI wrote down these messages I repeatedly received on scrap paper from an old calendar. Since I had no writing instrument, I used a piece of left-behind graphite lead for a mechanical pencil.
In the midst of that struggle with resentment, I received the following message from God:
“Even so, I love them. Somehow, I want to save them. That is the feeling in my heart. As their Savior, love them, love them, love them and save them. Save them. Do not hesitate. Love them and save them.”
This message is actually written around the very middle of the paper. I was touched by God‘s overwhelmingly deep love, and the tears would not stop flowing.
In essence, the message also said,
“When the conditions are fulfilled, even what appears impossible will surely fall into place.”
I understood this to mean that if I fulfilled the necessary conditions, the day would surely come when I could leave the apartment.
At the point of deepest despair, I gradually began to find the light of hope again through prayer.
On Sunday evening, 10th February 2008, my family sat down in front of me. My brother asked,
“What on earth do you want to do?”
I answered,
“I have no intention of sitting here in this confinement room and continuing to examine whether the Unification Church teachings are right or wrong.”
My brother then said,
“In that case, get out!”
I asked them to give me at least a little money because otherwise I would not even be able to take a train. They said,
“No. You don’t need any money.”
I said,
“After confining me for twelve years, isn’t it terrible to throw me out with nothing?”
Then my family physically lifted me up and threw me out through the entrance and into the hallway.
Continued in part 7: The Grueling, Lonely 10-km Walk to Freedom
Continued from part 1: Apartment Turned Prison: 12 Years to Break Faith
Continued from part 2: Escaped from 1st Confinement, But Abducted Again
Continued from part 3: Inside the Room Where They Tried to Break Faith
Continued from part 4: Trapped: 13 Breaking Faith of 1 in Locked Room
Continued from part 5: For 12 Years They Took My Freedom, Not My Faith
See also Abducted for Their Faith: Japan’s Untold Story
Featured image above: Artistic illustration of Toru Goto being thrown out of Tokyo apartment on 10th February 2008 after being held captive for 12 years and 5 months. Image: ChatGPT, 28th September 2026, edited 2nd October 2026.
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